the soundtrack of our life

We incessantly create a running commentary to the events in our life. These dialogs with ourself that are like mental subtitles that explain to us what we are doing and keep reminding us of the current storyline we are experiencing. New age culture delivers us through the internet a plethora of "reasons" for why we are feeling like we do: "sun flares are strong today, and they are earth-facing. They should be reaching us tomorrow by 5."

existential anguish

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We are supposed to be upbeat and full of optimism about how wonderful this world can be once we are liberated from all outer and inner bondage. And it probably can indeed be wonderful, but is that the point? How can I be released from bondage if I am not ready to face reality? 

So what is reality? First of all it is the fact of Eternity with a capital "E". This has all been going on for millions and billions and quadrillions of time. It did not start and there is no way it can end. 

face this emptiness

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Can the mind face and live with this emptiness and not escape in any direction?

(Krishnamurti - The Urgency of Change)

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To escape from the emptiness is fear. I fear the emptiness. As soon as I begin some 'doing' I have begun to fill the emptiness. What is the emptiness? Is it the sense of everything going on and on forever into all eternity? I see that everything has been going on for billions and billions of years, billions of cycles of the earth around the sun and, of course, even before and beyond that.